Wherever I Lay My Hat…

I understand the saying, but I see it somewhat different.

Hi dear friend.

Have you ever heard the phrase "Wherever I lay my hat, that's my home"? It's a curious saying that carries with it a sense of wanderlust and a touch of whimsy. While it might remind you of a popular song from the '80s with Paul Young and written by Marvin Gaye, this quirky expression has a meaning that transcends its musical roots.

The saying means that wherever you decide to rest your head and hang your hat, you make that place your temporary abode, thus embracing the concept of home being where the heart is. Wherever you are comfortable and at ease with yourself is your home, regardless where you were born or brought up.

This idea encapsulates a certain flexibility and adaptability to life's ever-changing circumstances. They say whether it's a cosy inn, a friend's couch, or even a hammock under the stars, your hat remains a familiar constant, transforming strange places into familiar spaces.

I understand the saying, but I see it somewhat different. I do not have a home town in the country I was born in. I often changed schools and cities growing up. And this has carried on in my adult years. I think kids adapt very easily to new surroundings. At least I did and looking back I don’t feel it has damaged me in any way. Rather the opposite, making me a free spirit.

But I always said that I will give my children a steady one house and home town to grow up in. When I hear friends who have had exactly that, and where their parents are still living in the same house they grew up in, in the same little town, I truly felt that this is what I want to give my kids. Well, now that did not happen. Instead, I started travelling young and loved it. My experiences of living in various countries have significantly moulded who I am today. But at the same time left me with a feeling of being rootless.

“Wherever I lay my hat”… It's a gentle reminder that true "home" is not confined to a specific location or four walls. Home is the sense of belonging, love, and connection we create wherever we choose to be. Home is the feeling of comfort we experience when surrounded by kindred spirits, regardless of the geographical coordinates.

I am truly lucky to have a beautiful family and they are my roots. As longs as I have them around me, my “hat” can rest and find home. As long as I have the walls, wherever that might be, it is easy to make a cosy home, as long as I have them under my roof.

These days my hat is torn. The kids are spread out in different parts of the world, we only have our youngest with us and she will surely find her own way of laying down her hat very soon. So now my dream for the future is to have all our five hats on the same shelf, or at least in the same country. So this saying does not resonate the way it used to do anymore.

I know the saying also underscores the importance of embracing change and letting go of attachments. Phew, the non-attachment lesson, when it comes to having my kids living very far away, is truly a tough one. At the same time it encourages us to approach life with a lighter heart and an open mind. Perhaps the most profound lesson this saying imparts is the recognition that life is fleeting and impermanent. Just as we lay our hat down in one place, we may pick it up again to continue our journey elsewhere.

“Wherever I lay my hat, that's my home”, holds wisdoms and life lessons. It urges us to embrace change, seek comfort in the intangible, and find our sense of home in the hearts of those we love. So when we wander through life, let's remember to wear our metaphorical hat with pride and curiosity, allowing it to guide us on our adventures and make every place we tread a little bit more like home.

Until next week, stay curious and grateful.

Much loves,

Kim

PS. Here is an interview our dear friend Mark Bajerski did with me and my daughter Emmylou last week. Coffee Chat With Kim & Emmylou Talking Seeing Ghosts And So Much More